I’m going to be successful.

I’m going to be really successful.

It’s an idea I’ve come to terms with.

I know everybody has their own idea of what success is, and I don’t think I’ll ever feel satisfied with my accomplishments but I know, that at a fairly young age, I will achieve the common definition of “success”.

That is not my fear. I don’t fear the future at all. I am far too sure of myself to be scared of what I control. Maybe I’m weird in that way, since I know most people fear the future, but not me, my greatest fear comes from a different place.

You ever think of what would happen if Kim Kardashian bumped into Kanye West in the late 90’s when Kanye was a struggling artist? Or better yet, what would happen if she bumped into him in 2003, a year before his first album would come out? This isn’t about Kim & Yeezus but they are just an example of what I’m trying to say.

Success is something that changes one’s self and those around you. But what if there was someone there that was the only there for the latter part of success? How do you know that they would have been there for the beginning? There is really no way to find out unless you go back to being unsuccessful, but who wants that?

I watched a Wale interview where he admitted to not dealing with women too seriously because he was paranoid. Paranoid that the girl isn’t there for the right reasons. When told that he couldn’t go back to being the young unsuccessful version of Wale to find out Wale said “That’s the ying and yang to the riches and fame”.

There it is. That’s my biggest fear.

There is this cliché of the millionaire with the large mansion with cars and all that and this image has become a sort of weird goal for some men. I don’t really get it. That looks like a nightmare to me.

*Wait a minute*

Let me clarify that last line. I’m not saying the women, cars, or mansion is the nightmare, but the feeling that millionaire feels when there is nobody around to enjoy all of that with.

Music videos don’t last forever, and I’m sure rappers don’t want them to. The Big Pimpin video was dope, and arguably one of Jay’s greatest videos. But I’m sure he enjoyed the On the Run Tour more.

I do not fear success.

I do not fear the future.

But I do fear a future in which the girl comes long after the success.

Will she love the owner as much as she would have loved the intern?

I’ll just cross that bridge if and when I get there.